There’s a realization that I’ve had to spend time getting eye-to-eye with. An inescapable fact. It’s ugly and painful, but I think it’s about as close to a truism as I think I can really get.
95% of the time, people won’t show up for you.
4.9% of the time they might because either you’ve coerced them or their interests and yours align.
The remaining 0.1% of the time is complete happenstance or someone actually being a Decent Fucking Human Being.
“The work”, then, is to find as many people that fit into that 0.1% as you can. Disregard the rest.
Because spending your time on the 95% of “no’s” and 4.9% of “maybe’s” is a waste of time, and there’s enough time wasted in our lives as it is.