Seems ironic in some ways how my current life path seems to be mirroring my best friend’s path about a year and a half removed.  Seems to me that everything seems to roll around in circles among most of the people I know, and that cycle seems dangerous to me on some level or another. […]

I have never encountered a day like that before.  That has to have been the hardest day of my life.  A low-level panic attack while I’m at work, indecision surrounding my relationship with my boyfriend, and feeling utterly lost after having been turned-away for a job yet again due to the fact that I’m ‘not […]

I feel lost.  I feel hopeless.  I feel as if I don’t have anywhere to go or anything I can do.  Fifth interview in 3 months and, yet again, I failed to secure the position because I am not technical enough.  My options are few-and-far-between.  I can’t seem to concentrate at home with other people […]

Feeling like what I want out of life is making a lot of other things in my life impractical or difficult to maintain.  Problem being, I can’t figure out whether it’s the fact that I have painted myself into a corner with my goals or if everything else is just something that’s kind of ‘in […]

Unfortunately (for me at least), I have no one else I can talk to regarding what will be written in the meat of this post.  All of the people I would lean on or depend on are either tied-up with their own lives or are so thoroughly disconnected from me that asking them for help […]

In the last post, I detailed why I think the uni-directional forward-march feels like it’s unstoppable most of the time… and let’s face it: most of the time it is.  The differences between the post I made yesterday and the ideas that formulated today are as wide as the oceans, and tell me one thing: […]

Today, I spent the greater part of the day trying to figure out exactly why I am doing what I am doing.  Why I go to work at all, aside from the fact that I have bills to pay and society won’t let me get by on what I feel is comfort, why I even […]

Dreams are funny and fickle things.  Had two bad dreams early this morning that woke me pretty quickly, neither of which I really had any clue what they were relating to until I thought about them a bit later. In the first dream, I found myself in what felt like a tall office building.  Turned […]

Lately, the topic of “commitment” has been present in most everything I encounter lately.  Commitment to my partner, commitment to my fitness, commitment to my job.  Seeing it from a place of fear in the heart, it’s easy to see how commitments can be terrifying and limiting and how the methodology of mediocrity can prevent […]

Humans are curious things.  We simultaneously crave power which isolates us, and we crave companionship and community, which puts us at-odds with our own natures.  Yet, the inexorable march of ideas and creativity continues.  The world is pregnant with ideas, given birth into the whirling, cacophonous vortex of reality. Once we have revived our ontological […]